Taking the Pressure OFF! It's Better That Way!

Fresh flowers are a necessary investment for my well being.  They always make a crazy day seem so much calmer!




Really, I don't have any cohesive thoughts worth sharing today.  I'm posting mostly for me.  For my sanity.  For a release in hopes that this brings some sort of clarity to my CRAZY head so that I can carry on with my day and think straight.  My kids have their first t.v time of the day and I'm giving them an hour to fry their brain and indulge in Cat in the Hat and Arthur.  We all know about Arthur...I'm sure I'll learn some valuable lesson that I can apply to own life.  Maybe there will even be a rerun of Muffy and the Big Bad Blog to make me feel stellar about posting my random bullets for the day.  Thank you Arthur for keeping my inner Muffy in check.  


*  Woke up today with so much anxiety about running.  Not sure why.  I'm not getting paid to run.  I'm not good enough anyway.  So why the heck do I feel any kind of pressure to do anything other than just have fun?!  Not sure what is going on with me.  I had bad dreams about running.  I'm ready to get a grip on these feelings of pressure and anxiety and shove them out the door because I certainly DO NOT perform well under pressure.  Especially the pressure I put on myself.  


*  Speaking of pressure, this week just seems crazy all around.  My oldest is turning 6 on Sunday and I am pretty much pulling a party out of my ear in a matter of a few days.  Hoping it is still "magical" and full of fun memories for her despite my total lack of energy.  But who am I kidding?  I am a very happy person who loves life immensely and I never had a birthday party as a kid.  We didn't even celebrate Christmas or any other holiday for that matter (long story) and I turned out okay.  Well, I guess that might be debated by some.  


When did the day happen that I gave my kids random sugary crap to eat in the car just so I can talk on the phone in quiet for five minutes?!  My oldest daughter didn't even get sugar until she was 3!  Okay, she was 1.  
  
*  I went to my old Elementary School that I worked at because I had to pick up some books from a teacher.  The above picture is what my son looked like when we pulled into the parking lot.  I cleaned him up as best I could considering my energy level.  He made quite the impression on all the staff.  He tried to beat up (hit) several of the teachers while shouting "Stop it!"  I love that his sisters have taught him such wonderful manners despite my efforts to try to reverse them.  


*  My daughter also looked lovely today on our visit.  She had on a pretty white dress decorated in chocolate, red paint, and mac n' cheese.  She went well with me and my stinky pits from my running top, usual running hat, and no make-up. Gosh, I need some pampering!  


*  On my way to the school I ended up driving in the direction of the grocery store that wasn't even near the school.  I didn't even realize that I was driving the wrong way until I was almost to the store.  Where is my BRAIN?!


I'm determined to NAIL my workout today!!  Now if only I can find some area in my neighborhood that doesn't have huge hills so that I can actually get some accurate split times.  Here is my workouts this week for those of you that enjoy that kind of thing and probably sick of my mommy rants and want more running:  


Monday:  10 miles slow recovery (just a little under 9 min pace)
Tuesday:  off
Wednesday:  1 mile warm up; 1 x 2 miles @ half marathon pace (shooting for right at 7 or a little under); 2 min active recovery; 1 x 2k @ 10k pace (6:45); 2 min active rec.; 1 x mile@ 5k pace (6:25/30 pace); 2 min active recovery; 1 x 800 @ 3,000m pace; 1-4 miles recovery run
Thursday: 8ish miles recovery/base pace and TRYINg to fit in resistance stuff
Friday:  2 mile warm up; 2 x 4 miles @ half marathon pace (shooting for 7 min pace); .5 mile active recovery. 2 mile cool down
Sat: 8 recovery
Sunday: 22 miles@ base pace.


I'm linking a Garmin activity stat page from my 21 mile run a few weeks ago to show you my elevation profile for my daily runs.  I want to find a flatter course sometimes for my speed work but I don't have time to drive somewhere...I'm squeezing my workouts in as it is.  The hills can really make it hard to hit pace.  But I guess the many uphills give me a fair amount of down hills too.  This was just a long slow run.  I tried to keep my miles at 8:30-9ish and hold myself back from running any faster on this one.  At mile 17 I picked it up just to see what it would feel like to hit marathon pace or around there.  ON my 22 miler this weekend I plan on running this same course and staying right around 8-8:30 with a few miles at 7:30 just to feel it.  I'll have a few marathon pace runs coming up too where I hope to maintain a 7:30ish for a longer distance to simulate marathon conditions.  Okay, here is the link:  21.3 long slow run.  

Enough Boring running talk.  Hope I didn't scare too many of you off but I know that some of you will totally dig the running talk!  


1.  Buying fresh flowers is one way that I pamper myself.  Having them in my house is a calm for me.  I also used to get my hair cut regularly before I started spending all my money on running clothes and gear.  What are some of your "self treats" that you pamper yourself with?  


2.  As a runner, mom, dad, etc.  do you put too much pressure on  yourself sometimes?  What do you tell yourself when you start to feel fearful or stressed about life?  I'm usually pretty down to earth these days and overall I keep everything flowing and feeling good.  However, there are certain places along my road that I get stuck in expecting too much of myself and feeling completely defeated by the impossible standards I'm setting.  I have to find things that just relax me, help me breathe and make me realize just how much I'm making things more than they really are.   I really should just drink more wine.  

Amanda


p.s  Okay, so this was a fb status just now by some mom on there: my 5yr old slammed my 4 yr olds face into the video arcade- blood everywhere nosebleeds sure can produce. A witness told me some random boy did it!...um no it wasnt a hit and run, just his sister.


I think this is funny Stuff!  Seriously.  So I wrote this:  I'm sorry. But thank you because this makes me feel better about my crazy life and fighting kids.


The person after me definitely doesn't have my same sense of humor and she probably thinks I'm awful to have enjoyed the status.  her: Wow praying for you as you use wisdom in discipline . Hope he is ok..


What?!  Laugh lady!  This is funny and this mom obviously needs a vent...she probably already disciplined the heck out of her kids.  No need to pray now. Just laugh.  It's over.  



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